I vividly remember the first time I brought my newborn daughter to church. She was three weeks old. As I set her infant car seat down on the coatroom floor at church, one of my mom’s friends told me she was precious, then quipped, “Enjoy every minute! It goes so fast.”
I remember standing frozen in stunned silence. Someone was already reprimanding me for not enjoying my baby girl? Why did she assume I wasn’t? Maybe it was the gray circles under my eyes brought on my sleep deprivation.
I carried the memory of that conversation throughout my kids’ childhood. Dozens of people admonished me to enjoy every minute with my children. No one says that now that they’re teenagers, I’ve noticed. It’s okay. Go ahead and laugh.
But a stranger at a writer’s conference set me free. She looked me in the eye and said, “Not every minute is enjoyable.” She was really saying, give yourself grace. Give yourself permission to not enjoy every minute. Boy, was that a relief. It liberated me from feeling guilty when I didn’t enjoy my kids.
There are priceless moments: holding and feeding a newborn. Kissing their heads while I cuddled them. Walking on quiet roads with a sleeping newborn and an alert toddler who asked me to pick just about every wildflower on the road. Soaking in the pure joy my son felt while riding his first bike.
Watching my daughter’s curls bounce on her shoulders as she ran through the yard, glorying in the spring sunshine. Seeing my son drive his go-kart like a NASCAR driver through our yard. Watching my daughter serve an ace in volleyball.
Yes. These are precious memories I cherish.
But there are a lot of moments it’d be impossible to enjoy, and ones I’d rather forget. Like my daughter’s piercing cry when she had her first ear infection at four months old. Or when my son used to slam his forehead off the couch in frustration because he couldn’t express his thoughts in words as a two-year-old.
How about their first stomach flu? Or when my daughter only got to play for one minute per game during basketball season? And I’ll never forget the stress of my son’s undiagnosed ADHD.
Honestly, I’m enjoying my kids now as much or more than I did when they were younger.
Yes, they’re disrespectful sometimes, and they argue with me quite a bit. But they’re basically self-sufficient, and help me a lot around the house. We enjoy each other’s company and have meaningful conversations. These are good days, too.
Yes, I miss the sweet smell of their baby hair. But I’d much rather enjoy today than look back in regret, wouldn’t you?
We’re in the middle of my favorite time of year: spring. I disagree with Andy Williams.
I’d say springtime in the Atlantic community is the most wonderful time of the year. My quince is in full bloom. It’s laden with gorgeous melon-colored blossoms. My forsythia’s chartreuse flowers stand out beautifully against the often-cloudy backdrop.
My golden daffodils still stand tall, as to my intoxicating pink, purple, and white hyacinths. Wild violets form a carpet in my lawn and dandelions have sprung up, too.
By the way, I like dandelions. They’re pretty, hardy, and create magical moments for children. Who hasn’t made a wish and blown dandelion spores to seal the deal?
But other beautiful plants will bloom throughout the spring and summer. I still anticipate my flowering crab tree, lilacs, dogwood trees, peonies, irises, snowball bush, Rose of Sharon, and, best of all, blue chicory along the roads.
I’m enjoying the beauty of today, and take comfort in the beauty that lies ahead. I agree with King Solomon:
“See! The winter is past;
the rains are over and gone.
Flowers appear on the earth;
the season of singing has come,
the cooing of doves
is heard in our land.”
- (Song of Songs 2:11-12 NIV)
So whether it’s your children or the beauty of spring, I hope you cherish at least one priceless thing today and have many beautiful things to look forward to in this season of your life.
Have a wonderful week. Blessings!