Lisa's Rants and Raves
This column might turn out to be the shortest on record. Reason being, I thought I'd have something else ready for prime time but it isn't finished. Instead I decided to rant wildly and do so in a brief manner. (Stop it. I really am going to try that brevity thing again.) I have another piece in the works for next time and it involves an actual cohort. I'm attempting to interview this person long distance via private messaging. (That does NOT say massaging. My goodness I'm always having to beg you to remove your minds from gutters, ditches and other narrow channels.)
Moving along, while we are working out the kinks in terms of that particular interviewing method, I shall rant madly and concisely for once in my life.
It has come to my attention that a certain segment of society simply has no sense of humor whatsoever. The type of person of whom I speak simply does not understand things like self deprecation and wouldn't comprehend sarcasm if it smacked him/her in the tuchas.
“Rants and Raves” is generally packed stem to stern with sarcasm, just in case that slipped by you. I'm just floored that some individuals don't realize that—especially after almost ten years of being my captive audience.
Saying, “just kidding” or “I made that up in order to jazz up this column” directly after a comment, has become an unfortunate necessity as of late. This is especially evident when the statement in question was CLEARLY meant in jest. I understand that sometimes it is essential to make declarations like the above-mentioned. However, (I know you were prepped for that word) there are times that doing so ruins the flow and defeats the purpose.
I also manage to poke some fun at myself on a weekly basis. This is carried out either via words printed here in the body of this blather, or by way of utilizing a SILLY picture. For one random example, anyone who does not understand that the goofy photograph is meant as a joke is either entirely too serious in life or is a humorless freak. That type of human is missing the point and should probably stick to topics of a more sober nature. Get thee to a nunnery—pronto.
I feel much better having said this. Do humanity a total favor and simmer down. It is actually quite therapeutic to take a good look at oneself and maybe even laugh hysterically. What a concept.
The SDG (Self Deprecating Gene) was passed along to me from my father. This mutation has come in handy when I find the need to ease tension and/or take a critical gander whilst simultaneously pointing and mocking. (See, I can multitask too.)
I don't want to cause massive pearl clutching in the reading region by stating the obvious but I will risk it. You see, my column is meant as an outlet in which I can bloviate about various topics in a lighthearted manner.
That is not to say that I don't tackle solemn issues of the day from time to time. I just try to do so by utilizing my bizarre technique of combining humor, sarcasm and a dash of self deprecation—mix thoroughly and bake. Every now and again the particular subject matter does not allow for such shenanigans. For the most part I try to be uplifting and, dare I say, maybe even a tad funny.
Let's all try to - See Hey page 20