Super scientific study

This week I'm attempting to carry out something out of the ordinary in order to take up space—I mean fill this particular region with delightful insight and words of wisdom. (I'm already off to a booming start as most of the readers have been forced to don the infamous barn boots this early in the game.)

It all began on a dark and foreboding afternoon when a dear friend of mine began to complain about citizens preoccupation with Pokemon. He indicated that they should instead be freaking out about “the fact that this nation is in distress.”

It wasn't really a dark or foreboding day at all. In actuality, it was oppressively hot and downright “close.” (For those of you who are not familiar with 1930s terminology, that would mean it was humid to the max.) Not to mention, we had suffered madly due to high winds the night before, which knocked out the electricity for several hours and led to my phone being out of order. It also resulted in spotty internet service and a back yard littered with branches from a huge tree. Of course, the aftermath interfered with my deadline and set my mood for the remainder of the day. I guess I have managed to digress but did so without the aid of parenthesis. Aren't you proud?

Moving along, I thought I would throw the above-non-mentioned-by-name person a bone and run with his concerns.

I have asked several people to participate in this most scientific study. The individuals range from screaming liberals to wild right wingers. I'm fair and balanced when it comes to this jazz, which is more than I can say for the media dynasty that runs with that fake trademark.

Mind you, I will not be commenting on the comments, so to speak. I am simply doing this to illustrate the differences and some similarities when it comes to various political philosophies.

The question I posed for the award-winning case study was this: List 5 things that concern you the most about the current state of affairs here in the USA; and/or list ways you would like to improve the state of the union. Here are the results of this most prestigious and peer reviewed research.

The first group of answers was submitted by that nameless and faceless man who launched the idea for this blather—I mean column.

Just for the record, he identifies as a “Rush Limbaugh Conservative.” 1. Control the border. 2. Less tax and regulations. 3. Line item veto for nonsense bills in Congress. No bills more than 25 pages. 4. Repair infrastructure. 5. Strengthen military. (I'm not sure if I need periods after each statement but am placing them just in case. Sorry to be grammatically inaccurate as I know it is absolutely appalling.)

The next participant identifies as a “Green Party Independent.” Her concerns are: 1. Systemic racism. 2. Jobs being moved overseas resulting in a lack of job opportunities for our young people. 3. Lack of single payer health coverage resulting in people feeling forced to stay at jobs for health insurance reasons. Also, many go bankrupt due to health care expenses. 4. Middle class tax burden has been increasing while the wealthy pay fewer taxes because they own our legislators. 5. Not enough effort being put into alternative energy options because of the strangle-hold the fossil fuel industry has on our politicians.

Thus far I find this to be fascinating in terms of how the concerns differ sharply along party lines. That is about the extent of my bloviating about the various answers so I shall move along with our next victim—I mean participant.

This woman identifies as a moderate and did not specify whether or not she was a moderate Democrat or Republican. She simply said, “I'm a moderate.” 1. Corporations taking over the country. 2. Money in politics. 3. Safety for all people no matter what color, shape, size, religious affiliation, etc. 4. War on police. 5. Poor treatment of veterans.

Our next gentleman calls himself a “Republican in the original sense of the word. Much like Abe Lincoln but with the abolition of slavery being the most prominent inclusion.” (That is quite a description don't you think?) I talk to this gent on a regular basis and I think I can explain this better than he. With that very statement I will be chastised but I'm willing to take the heat.

This person would like the Republican party to return to its roots back when they were actually the more liberal of the two major entities. Remember my darling readers, the parties flipped; Republicans were pretty much the original liberal thinkers of the day. Now stop freaking out and simply look it up.

Without further ado I shall list his answers. Several of his are ways in which he'd like to see the country change for the better. 1. Campaign finance reform including money out of politics, delegate system change, elimination of super delegates. 2. Health care reform – look to other developed nations since we are the only one that does not provide this. 3. Install term limits. 4. Gun laws or lack thereof. (People on no-fly list and terror watch list should be scrutinized in terms of gun purchases, etc.) 5. A mandatory draft is needed. In addition to military service a person could serve the country in another manner. This would be for a two year period and then college would be free for all due to serving the country. Israel does this currently.

A female liberal Democrat also weighed in on the situation. 1. Make sure that a Democrat is elected in November along with down ballot Democrats so we can actually make some progress. 2. *Monsanto must go so that people can stop being poisoned. 3. Put an end to fracking once and for all. It is poisoning well water and has caused many earthquakes. 4. I want a single payer health care system. 5. Better policing practices including the demilitarization of departments. (Even though I asked for five items, she listed another one so I will include it here in parenthesis so it won't be totally official. Here it is: I want people to have a living minimum wage. How was that for being sneaky?)

The next is rather short and to the point. He identifies as a “run of the mill Republican” and emphasized that he is not extreme in one way or the other. 1. I want an honest media that isn't owned by a large corporation. 2. Stop illegals from getting in to the country. 3. Cut down on wasteful spending in all areas of the government including the military. 4. Prevent billionaires from contributing too much money to candidates. 5. Term limits for everyone. - See Super page 7

Super - from page 3

The last person to take part in this insanity describes himself as a “Progressive Democrat.” His answers were also to the point. Perhaps this has to do with men versus women? I'm not sure and now I have digressed or thrown in my two cents or whatever. I shall get on with it right about now.

1. Climate change 2. Gun control. 3. Income inequality. 4. Rights for women. 5. Separation of church and state.

That concludes this study that will, more than likely, appear in future history books. I just want to give an overview of those surveyed before I exit, stage left.

Out of the 7 people who took part, only one was from this reading region. The “Rush Limbaugh Conservative” lives in the south as does the “Lincoln-type-Republican.” Two of the individuals dwell in the New England region; one would be the Green Party gal and the other is the “run of the mill Republican.” The moderate is possibly reading this paper as we speak and the “liberal Democrat” lives in Pennsylvania. The person who identified as a “Progressive Democrat” also lives in the southern portion of these United States.

I just remembered something and must make a statement. Try not to fling yourself into a corner whilst clutching a pillow as you rock back and forth due to fact that I did not include the headlines of the week. As you may have ascertained, just this much was enough to possibly fill 8 pages, much to your delight. With that, I shall officially release you from bondage once again. Thank you to all who participated and to all who have actually read this jazz in its entirety.


* Monsanto is a multinational agricultural biotechnology corporation based in the US. It's the world's leading producer of Roundup, which is an herbicide with the active ingredient glyphosate. It is also largest producer of genetically engineered seeds on the planet.