I have a casual question this week that I shall ask in a gentle and tender manner, as is my nature. (Would you please stop fainting when I declare such things? It's becoming tedious and it's a tad rude as well.)

Is anyone else ready to set hair on fire and leap from a water tower because of the recent “leader of the free world job interviews?” Has anyone become extremely nauseated due to being exposed to ONE candidate every time channel surfing is in play? How was that for casual? Did you notice that I asked more than one question?

For once I think I can stay on topic by bloviating, ranting and carrying on like a crank pot. (I usually carry out the second portion of that statement with ease.)

The now infamous corporate media is absolutely obsessed with the rude, crude, lewd and orange front runner. (It's true. Nothing rhymes with orange.) You know of whom I speak so there is no need to elaborate, much to your delight.

Did you know that he has LITERALLY (and you know I only use that word in its true sense) received almost 2 billion dollars in FREE airtime? Well, it's true. 2 BILLION dollars. Let that sink in please. I don't even know how to type that number, hence the spelling it out method.

Here is an example, which might lead to several examples, of what is unfolding before our very eyes. Actually it is no longer unfolding before the eyes in my own head because I simply refuse to take in the madness any longer. I will not view any kind of so called regular or cable news. I digressed a touch so we are good to go.

Les Moonves, who is the head of CBS, made an interesting (if interesting is now defined as horrifying) statement in early March. This took place during a gathering of other “newstainment” figures. This head of a major media outlet actually said that it (meaning The Donald) may not be good for America but it's “damn good for CBS.” (Mother, don't be appalled with the cussing as I'm quoting another individual.)

He went on to say that the dough was pouring in and it was “fun.” Yes, you read that right. Moonves concluded with, “I've never seen anything like this and this is going to be a very good year for us. Sorry, it's a terrible thing to say but bring it on Donald, keep going.”

If you do not believe me simply perform a computer search using his name along with the man who should be a spokesperson for Minute Maid Orange Juice. He shall be dubbed Oh Orange One (OOO) for the remainder of this piece.

This is an absolute disgrace to our supposed democracy. The framers of the Constitution had the crazed idea that the press should be in the business of keeping the government honest. Have you heard of speaking truth to power? Have you seen this in action in the last thirty plus years?

Our dear founding fathers did NOT intend for the Fourth Estate to act as collective cheerleaders for corporations, big money interests and/or members of the corrupt government. Call me a loon, and I know you have already done so, but I'm a bit old-fashioned when it comes to freedom of the press. Silly me.

The above-mentioned reality television star, who acts like a WWE wrestler to boot, is playing all media like Pa Ingalls on his fiddle. (Can you tell that Little House on the Prairie is playing in the background?) He is exceptionally savvy and has used it to his 2 billion dollar advantage.

His game plan follows a formula of sorts. It begins with a ludicrous statement, which happens about once a week or more, and then he simply counts the minutes. You see, that's all it takes in terms of his taking any kind of action.

After five minutes or less have ticked by, it becomes time for the reactionary portion of the outline. That is when the overpaid script reading pretty boys and girls, also known as talking bobble heads, step in and take charge of the situation.

Whatever goofy and often factually inaccurate remark that OOO has made then becomes a part of the 24 hour “news” cycle to the exclusion of EVERYTHING else. Isn't it quite ingenious?

Therefore, he avoids discussing actual meaningful problems of the day that he would tackle as president. He never needs to really respond because questions are never posed. In turn, the public at large remains unaware of his political platform. Instead we are spoon fed nonsense about this or that wife, how So and So “started it,” and other adult topics.

When is the last time you heard any kind of REAL issue being discussed when it comes to OOO? There is no time for such shenanigans because we are all too busy learning about hand size as it relates to other unmentionable body parts, jailing women for having abortions and how his rallies are so much bigger and better than any other candidate in the history of the world.

I am so very proud to be a member of a society in which the media keeps us up to date. How touching it is to be able to depend on them for getting to the root of any matter. How marvelous it is to really have our finger on the pulse of the world via that great Fourth Estate.

Before I have to be rushed to the ER from a sarcasm overdose, I best end this love fest. Plus, the house has begun to shake madly as Thomas Jefferson spins with great rapidity in his grave.


P.S. I must state that my dear life-long Republican friend, who shall remain nameless and faceless for his own protection, totally agrees with my assessment of the situation. So, na-na-na-boo-boo.