Lisa's Rants and Raves
To say that I have been under the weather for the past five days would be a total understatement. It would comparable to saying that the Hiroshima bomb caused a slight disturbance in atmospheric pressure.
With that being said, rather than utilize a rerun I have decided to fill part of this space with a piece of “fan mail” that I received the other day. I just love stuff like this for several reasons.
One would be that I get to utilize the words fan and mail. That causes me to burst forth in laughter of a disbelief nature while, simultaneously, causing me to feel super relevant and important, mind you.
Another would be that this particular letter proves that some people are alert and take me seriously in terms of answering questions I might pose during a column.
The other reason why this thrills me to the marrow is because I can use it to my advantage concerning pounding out an original piece.
Perhaps you can participate in future columns too. For example, I want a full report on my desk by Monday about this: I have no idea why Pete is so worthy of concern when it comes to “for Pete's sake.” Who is Pete and why do we care one iota about his thoughts, feelings and emotions? (For those of you who are paying attention, this has been broached in previous columns over the years.
Another one would be how long is a coon's age exactly? That is another that I have pondered out loud, or in print, and I would appreciate any and all input. That way when I need filler, I can simply reach for one of your answers, thereby killing two birds with one stone. (Why don't we explore the two bird scenario as well?)
Without further ado, and we all know it's about time, I now present you with this letter from a person. I am not using his name at all for his own reputation. As Mother used to say when someone told on me for doing something hideous back in my teen years, “I will NOT divulge my sources.” Boy how much I loathed that little statement. To be totally honest with you, for once, it was mainly because I had no clue what it meant at the time but, I digress.
Here is the letter:
Lisa, I was looking just now at an old copy of the Community News (9/28/15), and I noticed your comment about not getting the phrase "That's it, Fort Pitt." You've mentioned this before, so let me enlighten you.
As I understand it, "TIFP" was an advertising phrase many, many years ago for a now almost-vanished product: Fort Pitt Beer.
Duquesne Beer was a popular brew around Pittsburgh for years (brewed in Latrobe I think?), but they went out of business decades ago. Happily, they went back INTO business about three years ago, and I've been enjoying their product since then.
On one of my "beer runs," I discovered that the Duquesne Brewery had revived another of their old products, Fort Pitt Beer! I bought a case of it and enjoyed it, but I haven't seen it since. Jimtown Distributing in Jamestown regularly stocks Duquesne, but tells me that Fort Pitt is a "special order."
The significant thing is this: the phrase "That's it! Fort Pitt!" appears on each bottle on the smaller, upper label that is glued onto the bottle's neck right below the bottle cap. Don't take my word on this; drive over to Jamestown, "special order" a case, and check it out yourself. If you're not a beer drinker yourself, it shouldn't be too hard to find a research assistant who, in the interests of science, will be willing to assist in the necessary consumption!
With best wishes,
Name withheld to protect the innocent
Well, there you have that. Or, that's it, Fort Pitt. This, among other sayings, is one that is part of Mother's everyday vernacular. (I'm wondering if she hit the beer heavily back in the day perhaps?) She also enjoys, “Too late Ethel,” which she picked up from the infamous song, “The Streak” from long ago.
Speaking of Mother, before I go I have to let you know that as I type this she has turned 89 years of age!
Therefore, I am taking it easy on that woman this week. Also, now hang on to something here, I am taking her out for dinner this Saturday evening in order to celebrate the milestone. I want you all to simply take a guess as to where we might be heading for said meal. I shall impart ONE clue... We leave at 5:30, SHARP.
Honestly, that is all I can muster for the week. I must send out a HUGE thank you to the above non-mentioned individual who provided content for this rather unstructured piece. Hats off to that fan of Fort Pitt Beer. I literally couldn't have done this without you.