Something has been grating on my nerves for several weeks now and it's time to spread the love.
I'm just going to launch as, quite frankly, I've been sleep deprived, as of late, and I'm in no mood for long intros.
I insist that you remove yourselves from those floors. Come on...There you go. Yes, this is really Lisa. I know that it is super shocking that I am not prattling on incessantly in a feeble attempt to fill space.
Here I go. I cannot take another day of taking in the following term, description, saying and/or expression, which would be, “boots on the ground.”
Every time I flip on the telly to any of the major networks the talking head is, without a doubt, bloviating wildly about having boots on the ground in order to combat ISIS or ISIL, depending on who/whom is speaking. (More about that later...)
This has to do with actual soldiers, evidently in heavy footwear, walking across some foreign terrain in order to address radical loons, up close and in person. This would be the opposite of dropping bombs on the heads of the enemy from above, mind you.
First off, I'm not sure where boots would be if not on the ground. Do they normally hover about like those helicopter parents we all hear about these days? Are they generally spotted enjoying some coffee talk in a closet? Do they huddle in a bedroom corner in order to flirt with a pair of socks? Just where would said boots be if not on the ground, I pray thee?
“Will President Obama opt for boots on the ground?” “Should the United States have boots on the ground?” “We must have boots on the ground in order to....” “The answer to all of life's deepest questions is to have boots on the ground.”
Go get some blood work done pronto so that the doc might check for BOTGD, (Boots on the Ground Disease). Couldn't they use some other terminology like “combat troops,” “soldiers on foot” or “special forces in action”? Good gravy.
Finally, one of the more famous cable personalities decided to end the madness that is BOTGD by forbidding it to be uttered on his show. Any person who breaks the law must give a certain amount of money to the Wounded Warriors charity.
I think all imparters of horrifying data, should follow suit. What's your view? (By the by, I realize that “imparters” is not a word but, in typical Lisa fashion, it shall now be considered to be a word because I used it, so there.)
While we are at it, could we all agree on what exactly this particular group of madmen/women should be called?
Some say ISIS, (Islamic State in Iraq and Syria), whilst others use, ISIL, (Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant). I've noticed that the president is adamant about the ISIL usage. I'm not so sure why but I think he should just give in to our sick demands and utilize ISIS, as this is what most all news outlets are using.
I realize that is a total digression from the BOTGD topic. See, I really don't have much more to say concerning the supposed topic of this blather. Therefore, it was time for a digression. I feel I have accomplished that and can now move on with trying, desperately, to wrap this up in some kind of neat manner, with a purple bow atop, of course.
I simply will not tolerate any more of the disorder known as BOTGD. Yes, I know it's not a choice but, rather, a disease. Therefore, I might sound a tad uncaring about those who are afflicted with said ailment. I'm certain that I've insulted all who have gone through any sort of 12 step program but, I am an equal opportunity offender and a major digressor as well. Plus, I think I just invented another word, “digressor.”
I am having difficulty summarizing this ridiculous attempt at penmanship so, I shall simply pretend to be a radio announcer. This is Lisa Houserman, signing off live from the comfort of my own bedroom, here in the northwestern territory of Pennsylvania.
My boots are firmly planted on the ground and I'm ready to tackle ISIS, ISIL and, basically, any other lunatic group that comes my way. (How was that?)
THE END.